[Guest Teacher]

Thanks Eliza

[Guest Teacher]

Not something I’ve ever had to deal with but my two cents would be that if someone is bringing a child into a lesson, that child has huge potential to distract from the lesson however well-behaved the child is.

I guess it’s worth having a conversation and saying, “I didn’t mind having your child in last lesson but I don’t think it would be the best thing for your development to continue like that. If you absolutely can’t leave him/her with anyone else, maybe give me a nice early call so we can decide whether to go ahead or rearrange/cancel the lesson.”

No idea if that would work, but it might help.

[Guest Teacher]

What resources can you provide to help guide practice while you’re away? I’m currently making audio files of the technical exercises for my Rock School kids, I’m telling my ABRSM candidates about the Aural Trainer app, and slowly making crappy MIDI files in sibelius so at least they have something to sing along to as the practice. If their technique is at the appropriate standard for the exam, maybe some good resources to help them practice is almost as good as extra sessions with you.

[Guest Teacher]

I know it’s really late, this one——

You all have great advice for teachers. We really do have BOWLS of patience for our role as teachers. One of the first things I always tell parents (and keep reminding them throughout the coming months) is that learning an instrument is learning a new language. It needs time, patience, hard work and interest. I also give advice from the onset regarding exams—the pros and cons. Make sure you are always comfortable with the points you make and parents will listen. If there are issues, I normally don’t wait too long to suggest an alternative teacher or direction. This helps resolve tensions quickly. Tensions are unnecessary. Since I really enjoy teaching, when it begins to feel uncomfortable on my part, I’m normally the first to make a suggestion to either put away exam pieces for the time being and try other stuff or give the student an option to stop taking lessons. It might be helpful to have pushy parents sit in on some lessons as well. I do this very frequently, which makes them a bit more realistic with their demands. I also look for opportunities for students to perform in front of small audiences ( recitals) which at times gives them a boost and change in perspective and they start to thrive. This does not work for all but it is a good way to give students an opportunity to “work to perfection” without pressure of exams. I also let students choose music to play alongside exam pieces, especially when there is a lot of time, which is often the case. However, it is often tricky and we all as teachers have to find a balance. Presenting your view with an air of confidence goes a long way…..

[Guest Teacher]

Sorry late to join in on this one….I recently had a similar experience with a pushy parent. Their back ground was teaching in another musical instrument where the belief was that it was all to do with grades. So tricky! I stated what I believed was best and had to really stick to my guns.

I was happy to offer to help the student take their pre grade test in singing (prep test ABRSM) that gives children the opportunity to see how an exam feels without any pressure of pass/fail. This was a good first base, and a few exam boards offer pre grades which are useful. It went well and the experience was enjoyable. The parent wanted me to carry on heading towards grades but with very little lesson time. This just was not feasible or realistic for either myself or the child. As they were unable to meet my terms we had to part ways.

I think if parents cannot see that the teacher is the expert and knows what is best for each individual student then this is a tricky situation to be in and really difficult as you need them to listen to you. At the end of the day the child’s happiness, confidence and development musically is the teacher and parents responsibility. If a parent is not wiling to listen and follow advice then I agree with Eliza, an alternative teacher needs to be sought.